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Showing posts from October, 2011

Unpacking Anger

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Harkening back to a post from several months ago on anger, I continue to be amazed that so many people blame their anger on others.  Here is a test...if you are wondering whether or not you truly take responsibility for your own anger, check out how you excuse anger.  If you use statements like "It's just something that comes over me", or "It makes me so anger when you do that...", or "It's something I can't control it" ..then there is a pretty good chance you don't take ownership of your own anger.  Dissociating yourself from your anger and making anger an it suggests that you do not see the responsibility that is yours alone to own.   Imagine the power of change that would come from saying instead, "I let my anger come over me" or "I allow my anger to overwhelm me when I see you do that" or "It's like I can't control my anger".  The sooner we own the emotions we feel, the more empowered we are to

Forgiveness Makes You Smarter

If there is one thing that stands out from my days of rage and anger, it is the fact that my mind was forever clouded.  Uncertain.  Double minded. Scattered. Unfocused.  Well, ok, not entirely unfocused...more like overly focused...right on the thing that I had organized my life around, being the abuse and all it's ramifications.  Through the early days of my career I made mistakes, had trouble learning, remembering my course load and training and overall, had a general sense that my mind just wasn't working as well as it should have been.  Thoughts would stray, concentration was hard, daydreaming became second nature and I would fog or brown out of a conversation.  Nothing held my interest for very long and chasing down an idea was like trying to remember a dream. It did not get much better when I surrendered my life to Jesus in my late 30's.  In fact, scripture and trying to understand what God was saying only confused the issue. So, fast forward to today.  Over the p