Where Did the Year Go?

Life has a way of whipping on past with barely a notice. That's what happened to 2016.

Started the year with a new position in a new company, feeling sheepish to be going back to the marketplace, and now the year is gone. The sheepishness is too. Not sure what's replaced it though.

This was a tough year. Not half as tough as it was for some of my loved ones, but tough enough.

I lost an uncle.  That hurt, mostly because of what he represented to me...a safe loving male adult. Having not seen too many of those growing up, his was a special kind of role,  modeled well. He is well missed, and while I'm sad for my aunt and cousins, am happy for the surety that we will indeed see him again.

I lost sight of a goal and a dream. That hurt, mostly because of what that represented to me...as one who has struggled all my life with starting and not finishing, was this just another abandoned "project"?  But I am realizing that timing for things like vocations, dreams, and missions is never ours. Our offering is to prepare. Sometimes preparation feels like 3 steps forward and 2 steps back so you hardly ever notice the 1 step further along you got.  But 1 step further remains 1 step ahead of where you were and that counts for something.

I broke a shoulder. That hurt, mostly because...well, it just did! And for days afterwards, I had butterflies in my stomach every time I walked on a surface that felt unsure.  As silly as it seems, the fear of falling compelled me to ponder this thing called aging, which in turn evoked a desire for health and strength. So I'm eating well and moving more and making time and space for prayer and restful solitude.

What will 2017 bring I wonder?



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