Peace Treatments

Was having dinner with a friend last night, and as we talked about things that have been happening in my life, marriage, parenthood, etc., I made a comment to the effect that I was so thankful that I had not given up on any of them.  I believe my exact words in summation were "I think too many believers give up one day too soon, maybe that's why Jesus said, live only for today". We both just sort of stopped talking at that point and pondered it...an epiphany in process, coming live at you from a table in the Keg..."giving up one day too soon"... How many times in the anger and pain of a struggling marriage or in the fear and uncertainty of parenthood did I envision an intolerable future and come to believe words that told me if I don't make a change now, today, this minute, that future will play out.  How many times did I resolve in those moments to give up, leave, quit, that's it, I'm done...only to go to bed, have sleep overtake me and wake u...

Just over a year ago Jim and I took up hiking.  Prior to that, we did not do an awful lot together.  He liked to golf with his best friend, and I liked to read and study, and that's just the way things were.  We spent some time together going out for the occasional dinner but did not enjoy a hobby together, unless you count all the years of watching the kids play ball. After the kids became adults, and we no longer had the common activity of parenting to keep us connected, I recall hoping and praying that somehow we could find something, anything, to re-discover what drew us to each other in the first place.  Life can get like that. Careers, children, bills, responsibilities and exhaustion all conspiring together to make true intimate relationship scarce. So sans kids, he spent his free time on the golf course while I spent mine shopping, working,  reading or watching TV. I remember well when we started ...

Here's something I'm wondering.  On the night He was betrayed, Christ prayed in the garden for His future church, the Bride.  He prayed that we would be one, just as the Father and He are one.  Specifically, He asked "I pray also for those who will believe in Me...that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in Me and I am in You.  May they also be in us so that the world may believe that You have sent me . I have given them the glory that You gave Me, that they may be one as We are one, I in them and You in me.  May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved Me" (John 17:20-23)   Did you catch that? Our oneness, our unity, is what lets the WHOLE WORLD know that the Father sent Jesus, and that the Father loves them - the world - as much as He loves Jesus. I've said it before and I'll say it again - the key to the world coming out if it's...

There is a sense of restlessness in my soul these days.  It's one of those "can't quite put my finger on it" kind of fleeting things, akin to trying to remember a dream as it flits away in the wakefulness.  Yesterday as I tried to talked to Jim about it, I kept crying.  Now, where is THAT coming from? At one point he asked why I sounded so intense and I replied that I was feeling frenetic, stuck between feeling like a chicken running around with it's head cut off and trying to shake an immovable, monstrous tree to see if any fruit falls out.  I know that for everything there is a season and that God has a plan, a purpose, and a roll out. My problem - if you can call it a problem - is that I feel ready for whatever THAT is,  NOW.  It does not help that I'm utterly bored in my job.  With all this learning I want to start applying, and adjusting claims is not conducive to application of what I'm learning.  So, in...

It's still somewhat surreal, this current pursuit of mine.  Who would have thought it? I remember thinking that finishing my certificate in mediation at the Justice Institute was daunting and now I have finished the first residency in my master's program at the School of Peace and Conflict at Royal Roads University.    It was tough.  Three weeks of intensity, completing 2 courses. I struggled with doubt, fear and homesickness.  I found myself second guessing my motives, skills and whether or not I was truly on the right path.  This all culminated in my marks, which came back this past Friday.  An A- and a B.  After achieving a 4.13 GPA in the leadership program at TWU, I was disappointed.  But then I realized that the voice in my head was the overly responsible, perfectionist, control freak that still lives in me. She's not quite crucified yet I see. LOL.  Well, at least the feedback from the pro...

I have been musing lately over the idea of dedicating the next few posts (or how ever many it will take) to "conflict in red letters", meaning...dissecting everything that Jesus had to say about conflict.  The idea is not original. My pastors have been preaching a series entitled "In Red Letters" for several weeks now.  They've talked about everything from "money in red letters" to "woman in red letters" but nothing on conflict...so I think I'll give it a go. So starting in Matthew, chapter 5, verse 9.. "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons [and daughters] of God" (NIV) The word used for "peacemakers" is eirenopoios which translates to "reconciler" and "one who lives a life whose tenure and effect is peace and reconciliation and not aggression, hostility, antagonism or combativeness" (Hebrew-Greek Key Study Bible, 1996, lexical aids, p.1650) There is a quirk of irony here...

I was talking today - as I am wont to do - about my learning and healing through spiritual 12 step.  I am amazed how teachings that were incorporated into my life over 10 years ago still inform all that I do today and continue to impact me in ways that help me heal and grow.  Anyways, we were talking about step 8 and 9... Step 8 - Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all. Step 9 - Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others and the question arose..When is it appropriate to make amends and how do we know whether to do so will harm them or others?  My hunch is that the answer to these questions is found in another...what is compelling you to make the amends?  What is motivating you, the desire to alleviate and heal the pain you caused them or the need to lesson some of the guilt and shame you carry over it?  I believe this step takes...