Restorative Mediation



Typically, mediation as it is done civilly, is simply a vehicle to bring about resolution to what ever conflict is going on. The focus is on the thing that needs resolving, such as property division at divorce, details surrounding custody, the value of quantum in bodily injury cases and the division of assets in estate disputes, among other things.




The practical skills training one receives from institutions that teach alternative dispute and conflict resolution teachs one to concentrate on the "thing", collaborate to get resolution, and if necessary, compromise. There is no real attention given to the relationship after the "thing" is resolved. Usually the parties go away, having the "thing" settled, but often the relationship is damaged forever.




You see, from the worlds perspective, mediation collaborates for a solution, and lets the parties go their way with the solution as their reward. This kind of mediation does nothing to uncover sin, in fact, does not even recognize sin, and certainly, there is no attempt to restore the relationship, only to make it "workable" for as long as the parties are required to interact.




In contrast, restorative mediation focuses on repairing the harm and restoring the relationship, and often involves taking ownership (through confession) and making amends (the fruit of repentance). When the goal is to repair the harm and restore the relationship, the solution to the "thing" that brought the parties to the table is a given. When restorative mediation is combined with teaching communication and conflict resolving skills, it can not only resolve the "thing" but transform the persons involved, leading to spiritual growth and maturity, and ultimately, "oneness!"




The greatest Mediator is Jesus Himself. Even though He was innocent and holy, He took "ownership" of our sin, made the amends on our behalf once and for all, and restored our relationship with God our Father, so that now we can come freely to His throne of grace with confidence that we shall never be rejected.




Imagine the possibility of having our difficult relationships restored to the same extent, so that we can come freely and without fear to one another, and when need be, have conversations about difficult things with one another, with gentleness and respect, hearing and being heard?



Sounds like a possibility we could certainly live into if we follow Him who led the way.

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